He who finds a wife finds a good thing. --Proverbs 18:22

Because marriage between one man and one woman is the most important and most noble of institutions the Lord has ever created, it shouldn't come as a surprise that the Bible reveals God's divine blueprint and schematic for marriage. A blueprint is a detailed plan or design. A schematic is the structural diagram of that master plan.
Genesis 1:26-31 and 2:18-24 is the master blueprint, while Ephesians 5:22 through 6:4 is one of the structural schematics of harmonious marriage outlined in the Bible.
But what happens when the master plan or the structural schematic for marriage is altered? What happens when a husband or a wife attempts to break God's covenant of marriage between a man and a woman? What happens when a husband or a wife wants to end that covenant?
WITH THIS RING I THEE WED
In April 2006 as I was walking the 10-foot, 60-pound cross on a major road, a woman made a quick U-turn so she could talk to me about her failing marriage. Her husband had left her for another woman. She was crying and asked a lot of questions. She asked me to pray for her marriage, that her husband would come to his senses and return to her and her children.
I asked the Lord to dismantle the illicit affair, demolish the relationship and break her husband's hardened heart into pieces no matter what it took, so God could give him a brand new heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26-27). I also asked God to save the other woman's soul but to do whatever it took to pulverize and end the illicit affair.
I noticed that Mary (not her real name) didn't have her wedding ring on, and encouraged her to begin wearing it again, as a sign to the Lord and to her husband that she not only wanted the marriage to work, but that she also believed that God would save the marriage. She agreed, and I noticed an immediate and distinct difference on her countenance as she got back into her vehicle and sped off with a smile on her face (and her faith). I lifted my hands and thanked God for the opportunity to walk the cross and to pray long and hard for this distraught woman.
FLASH FORWARD TO SEPTEMBER 2007
This day is no different than others. Walking the cross on a major highway of the city, I continue to be amazed at all the people passing by in their vehicles and honking their horns and waving wildly as they drive by. I can't help but think that this is what the ministry of Christianity is all about: presenting the cross of Jesus Christ as God's plus sign to hurting humanity; proclaiming the name of Jesus Christ to everyone I pass by on the sidewalks; and praying in the name of Jesus Christ for those driving by in their vehicles and especially for those who come up to me and ask for prayer.
A voice breaks through my audible prayers. "Sir...sir, I've got something to tell you!" I look at and immediately recognize the woman who had made a U-turn on that major road back in April. I lowered the heavy cross from my shoulder and to the ground and say hi. "Do you remember me?" she asked. Of course I do. She smiles real big.
"Last year on Ashe Road you prayed for my marriage," she reminded me. "The one thing I remember you telling me was to put my wedding ring back on. So I did." She paused. "Every time my husband came to visit our daughter he'd look at my hand and ask why I was still wearing my wedding ring. I told him why and the other things you told me to say." She grinned. "After six months he broke off the relationship and asked me if I would have him back!"
Her face was beaming now. "He said that my continuing to wear the wedding ring he gave me when we were first married was the one thing that kept convicting him and making him feel so guilty." She began to cry. "Our marriage was saved and we love each other so much!"
"I've been looking for you for months. Every time I went out I'd scan the street on both sides in search of you and the cross." She paused. "And today...here you are! I can never thank you enough for encouraging me to continue wearing my wedding ring and for offering me so much hope when I first saw the cross." She began to cry again. "Thank you." We talked for a few minutes, then she left, a great big smile on her face...and her faith.
AN AMAZING UPDATE THE WEEK BEFORE CHRISTMAS 2011
The Sunday before this Christmas my wife Jeanette and I were shopping for groceries after enjoying a Christmas musical that our grandnieces were part of at their church. A woman tapped me on the shoulder. As I turned around, I recognized who it was. "Remember me?" Of course I did.
Here she was again, a big smile on her face (and her faith). "Here you are in the same store at the same time we are. I wanted my daughter to meet the man who prayed so hard for me, my husband and our family." A smiling and beautiful young daughter extended her hand. "Hi," I greeted.
Of course we talked a good while, but then said our good-bye's. I gave them each the tract I hand out during Christmas: The Christmas Cross, which shares why I also walk the cross throughout the winter months and even (especially) on Christmas day. Sin, death and the devil don't take holidays. Christmas finds many people experiencing seasonal sadness and holiday hurt just like this family had gone through.
Jeanette and I continued to shop. Again, someone tapped my shoulder. It was Mary. She handed me a store gift card and said, "This is nothing compared to what you did for my family." I was surprised, but said thank you. We talked a few more minutes and she and her daughter went on their way.
I looked at Jeanette and smiled. Their gift meant a lot to us. But more than this, their living testimony meant everything to Jeanette and me. I was especially glad that Jeanette was with me to experience what happens often as I walk throughout the streets or even shop at stores. Smiling faces, smiling hearts, and smiling testimonies of what our awesome God can do--even (and especially) through such a simple thing as wearing a wedding ring even though maybe you don't feel this will help.
GOD'S TRIANGLE OF LOVE AND THE LAW OF MARRIAGE
If you're struggling in your marriage, if your hope is eroding, and even if you're too angry at or hurt by your wandering spouse to even want to reconcile, please send for the free brochures I have on marriage and reconciliation, especially The Law of Marriage.
The illustration on the left shows what it takes for a husband and wife to get closer to each other, whether or not their marriage is going good or is on its last leg. Can you figure out what the illustration is saying?
Simply, it takes both the husband and the wife to move up closer to God if they want to get closer to each other. This is the law of marriage. And it is also how God can turn a dying or unhappy marriage into a good thing!
God's biblical blueprint and scriptural schematics for a happy marriage, an enduring marriage, a dying marriage or a recovering marriage is written in the Bible. Sometimes all that's necessary for God to restore and revitalize an all but dead marriage is a simple act of faith, such as continuing to act like you are married even if you don't feel like you are. Miracles still happen every day. The secret is to endure. This, too, is the law of marriage. Glory to the King!
Send all correspondence to: Tom Alexander, Box 10551, Bakersfield, CA 93389. E-mail: Tom@WalkTheCross.com
Send all correspondence to: Tom Alexander, Box 10551, Bakersfield, CA 93389. E-mail: Tom@WalkTheCross.com